Thursday, February 24, 2005

Blagojevich: The Steer Hunter

We learn the sad truth from the Springfield State Journal-Register opinion page today:
WE PLEADED last week for Gov. Rod Blagojevich to consider allowing Flushy,
last year's State Fair Champion steer, to wander a field for the rest of his
natural life. But mid-afternoon on Wednesday, we received the following
communiqué from the governor's office: "Flushy is now in cow heaven. Sorry."

Just so you don't think the Blagojevich people are heartless, that
message was followed by one of those sad-face emoticons. :-( Not that an
emoticon is going to do much for old Flushy now. The one-time champion has been
reduced to chops.

Normally, Flushy, who was almost 2 before he was slaughtered, would
have been dispatched months ago. In fact, the typical steer is slaughtered at 12
months. While some grew quite angry at the governor for not following the rules
of steer slaughter, we think Flushy probably enjoyed the extra year of grazing,
flicking his tail and fertilizing the fields near Sherman.

DESPITE A RATHER simple last meal of hay and water, Flushy had added a
few hundred extra pounds beyond the typical slaughter weight of a steer. Experts
tell us that extra weight isn't all muscle. It looks like Gov. Blagojevich will
be slicing fat from more than just the budget this year.

Or to paraphrase South Park: "Oh my God, they've killed Flushy".

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

You're supposed to feed cattle good old Illinois CORN before you butcher them, not hay. Unless you want some tougher than necessary prime rib. Of course, Rod looks like he's got some pretty good jaw muscles...

Anonymous said...

Speaking of steer hunting ...

http://www.rockfordregisterstar.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20040918/OPINION0101/409180315/1045/NEWS