Funky Large Hairy Primates

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No, Bigfoot is not hiding in Funk’s Grove. Give me a break.

FUNKS GROVE - Researchers have been looking for Bigfoot in Funks Grove, but a
local zoologist interested in the elusive creature's lore said he would be very surprised if one is found there.

A report last fall by people who said they saw a large hairy upright creature in a ditch in rural Shirley attracted a team of researchers from Searching for Bigfoot Inc. of Menlo Park, Calif.

Angelo Capparella, a professor at Illinois State University, said he also heard the report and talked to the people at the time.

He said that if there is a Bigfoot - a big if in his book - Central Illinois is not the place to find one. Even though Funks Grove is a wooded area, there just isn't much habitat locally to support or conceal a large primate, Capparella said.

Well, that is unless that primate can survive on maple syrup. I’m not sure why the Pantagraph is wasting time on this snipe hunt.