Friday, April 28, 2006

Friday Beer Blogging: Getting All Light On Your Heinie Edition

You probably have noticed by now that Heineken has launched a massive media campaign to promote its new Premium Light beer. “Succumb to Smooth” is their slogan. Which is kinda stupid but whatever, that’s not my main beef. No, my complaint is that Heineken has “succumb” to marketing pressures to compete in the light beer market.

Look, I have nothing against light beer in general but Heineken shouldn’t be light. A Heineken is a Heineken. It’s a whole beer, nothing light about it…until now. THIS is a Heineken:

And I really like this workplace Heineken daydream:

And to round out this Heineken post we have a little beer porn. CAUTION: Graphic depiction of beer intimacy may not be suitable for children.

True beer love.


Bike said...

Very Nice! No light/lite here either--straight-up whole beer is it!

Anonymous said...

I don't know, man... I've always thought of regular Heineken as a quasi-light beer. It does nothing for me.

Of course, the last time I had Heineken was back in college after I'd staggered home after a party, where I had the pleasure of hitting off a keg of Bell's Pale Ale (drinking out of a glass. A high-class party, it was). Some folks in my building were having a soiree of their own and invited me to join them. I graciously accepted and drained a cup of the Heine. I thanked them for their graciousness and went into my apartment, where I immediately brought up the contents of my stomach. I blamed the Heineken.

Right now, I just finished a glass of Boulevard Zon, their interpretation of the Belgian White style. You definitely can taste the wheat beer aspect of it, but there is virtually no hint of the orange peel or coriander that defines the style. New Belgium's Sunshine Wheat is my favorite American Belgian White. Two Brothers' is nice, too.

If they made a card for beer nerd-dom, I'd be carrying one.

JoviFan said...

Not to mention, isn't that the funciton of Amstel Light?

Anonymous said...

Dave's got a point though whether you're a Heinie fan or not.

Let's just look at the pitch for a moment.

They have defined themselves as a quality beer not to be confused with all others.

Now it turns out there was nothing magical to the formula afterall - obviously it can be tampered with - so as to produce a lite version.

Nothing pure blood about Heinie?

They are meddling with the primal forces of nature here!

Let's get trendy.

This is an attempt to grab some horizontal shelf space, and could in the long run backfire by diluting the brand's image because as we see in the post Heinie has it's fans, but so do other beers - and it's all very much a matter of taste. Taste which is shaped around personal experiences, and even memories which may not have much to do with the actual sense of taste.

I say toss the lite. Heinie doesn't need the slama-bama weekend drinking crowd anyway, and to appear to be appealing to such a group is undignified, and beneath contempt.

I say it's time for a letter campaign!