The Eleventh Hour has learned that President Bush will name 23 year-old Andrea Johnson as the new chairman of the Federal Reserve, replacing the retiring Alan Greenspan. Johnson, who has been Bush’s bank teller for two years, is said to have been the president's second choice after he was informed his favorite automatic teller machine would not be eligible for the position.
Bush is reported to have said his choice was based on Johnson’s superior money-handling abilities. “You should see her count back my withdrawal money, it’s awesome”, Bush told monetary advisors at a recent White House meeting.
UPDATE: I guess Bush had a third choice in mind. Maybe Andrea was busy or something.