Lute- icrous

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Oh, Sting-a-ling-a-ding-ding. OK I’m a fan of The Police from way back (first two albums only, before they got too big), so this really made me laugh:

[…] Last month at the Television Critics Association press tour, Sting gave a performance for critics in one of the Pasadena Ritz’s swankiest ballrooms (to promote a Feb. 20 PBS "Great Performances" program on PBS). The stage was lit by candles, and der Stinger wore a Renaissance-y frock coat as he and a gifted accompanist played centuries-old songs on lutes.

Yes, lutes.

It was all so tasteful. So historically accurate. And even quite melodic, at times.

But I couldn’t help feeling like an extra in an outtake from “Monty Python and the Holy Grail” (I kept humming, “Brave Sir Robin,” the minstrel’s tune from that film).

After half an hour, I fled, thinking, “This is the music they play in the spa in hell.”

Most everyone else at the performance thought it was lovely (and, as you probably do, they thought I was a cretin for leaving).

But did they obsessively listen to “Zenyatta Mondatta” and “Regatta de Blanc” for years? Did they overanalyze every lyric from “Ghost in the Machine” and “Synchronicity”? I’m sorry, I just know which Sting I like, and though I do appreciate his great solo singles, I’m a Police fan from way back. Ye Olde Lute
Tunes just didn’t do it for me. Sorry.

I was sad, though, that I missed the handful of Police tunes Sting played at the end of his set that night. On the lute.

Nothing against lutes. In fact, how cool would it be to hear "Walking on the Moon," lute-style?

I’m thinking, not very.